Cry Hard 2: Cry Harder

February 8, 2010 by Eric Loy 

If only ‘Dear John’ lived up to our fictional working title

The world of flu-filled, sweatpants-Saturday movie binges just got another title for the playlist.

Yes, from the wading pool of bittersweet romantic narrative that bore such sob jobs as the “The Notebook” and “A Walk To Remembers” comes another film that bathes in the familiar waters of all Nicholas Sparks adaptations and comes out baptized in the salvation of bittersweet, uh, bittersweetness and things that are, well, sweet but bitter at the same time.

Or something like that.

“Dear John” follows the doomed romance of Special Forces solider, John Tyree (Channing Tatum) and Savannah Curtis (Amanda Seyfried).  The two meet on the picturesque South Carolina coast while John is on R&R and Amanda is on spring break from college.  Chivalry, or something like it, prevails as John rescues Svannah’s purse from the waves, and the sparks fly on contact.  (Tatum had his shirt off. She didn’t stand a chance.)

Flirtatious glances develop into passionate kissies, and the two vow to write to each other as much as possible during John’s remaining 12 months in the army.  But in the wake of 9/11 (Dash or slash? I can never remember), John is compelled to extend his tour, and the relationship strain becomes too much.  He eventually gets “the” letter, and just like “Notebook,” the girl goes for the sweet substitute, so no one can be too miffed.  And no, that’s not a spoiler, it’s the damn title of the movie.

The problem with “Dear John” is that it comes across like a half-decent cover band.  Its success is limited based on the fact that we’ve already seen a grander version of the same tune years ago.  Director Lasse Hallström might be commended for his dialed-down presentation if the result wasn’t so dull. Terminal/chronic illness, tragic loss, the lovers who can never be, kissing in the rain, tasteful boinking – all the twists and turns of a romantic roller coaster, but Hallström slows the cart down to a crawl and we lose the excitement.

As much as I’d like to rip on Tatum, he does well in the hunky quiet-guy role.  He and the rest of the cast deliver adequate albeit forgettable performances.

The real story in this movie is not two kids’ shot at love but how their experience, although ultimately a failure, has left them better people because of it.

Aw, how bitterly sweet.