RPC SPEED DATING: Sarah’s take

February 8, 2010 by Sarah Steelman 

Lesbian speed-dater overcomes her shyness and bonds with a fellow Harry Potter fan through speed dating

As the month changes from January to February, love fills the air.

For some, the stressful part of the day is just deciding whether to get their significant other chocolate or flowers. For others, a scurry to find a Valentine begins.

Personally, I never felt the need to take part in this frantic race to find love before February 14. Two years ago, at the age of 16, I came out to a few close friends and family members.

Since then, I have been focusing on growing and furthering myself rather than searching and trying to blossom a relationship with “The One.”

So how did I, someone who has never felt the need to be in a relationship, end up speed dating? The answer is, to test myself. I have always got into gear when it comes to school or work, but when it comes to social situations, I stall quite a bit.

I am a shy, Harry Potter-obsessed nerd and have a very hard time putting myself out there to start conversations with others. Speed dating would be the ultimate test for me to see if I could be open and find people who liked me for me.

As I rounded the corner to head toward the event, surrounded by people I knew, I started to feel my anxiety increase upon seeing several strangers who I could potentially end up “dating” within the hour. Once the doors opened, I clung to the people I knew and did everything I could to avoid putting myself out there and mingling.

This worked until one of my more social friends tried to get me to mingle by introducing me to other people. Through this uncomfortable experience came a positive outcome, since my friend just happened to introduce me to another lesbian.

From then on, when I was forced away from my friends to head to the table of my future dates, I had someone by my side.

After sitting at the table hearing all the instructions, the true test began: the dating itself.

I started out a bit shaky and guarded. I asked a lot of questions and was interested in what the first girl was saying but distanced myself enough to not let my personality come out for fear of being rejected. The second girl happened to be the one I had met before taking my seat at the table so conversation was a bit easier.

I asked the normal questions and then decided to start opening myself by first asking her what her favorite book was. As I awaited her answer, I thought about how amazing it would be if happened to also be a nerd who loved Harry Potter. While thinking this inside my head, I heard the words spoken out loud.

After a minute I realized that she had actually said the answer I was thinking in my head.

Being as shocked as I was, I did the thing I swore I would not do: I told her that I go to the annual Harry Potter conferences.

Declaring this fact about myself to people who do not know me very well is always the stupidest thing ever because it is very weird and very nerdy. But to my surprise, she told me how she had always wanted to go to one but never knew where they were.

Hearing this helped me open up completely and I became more comfortable.

When our time was up I moved to the next girl and remained open after having such a great experience. The next three girls I met were all very nice and we had some good conversations, but I couldn’t get my mind off the second girl I had met.

The table only had six of us girls, so we finished the dating pretty early on and had 30 minutes to just talk to each other.

Once all the straight people were done with their dates, I went over to wait for my friend and so did the second girl. We continued to talk and only stopped when both our friends were with us and we had no excuse to stay there and continue.

If you would have asked me last week if I thought anything would have come out of speed dating, I would have laughed and said, “No way!”

But now that it is all said and done, I still cannot get my mind off of the second girl I met. Whether it ends in romance or friendship, I will call my speed dating venture a success.